(Capitol Steps parody of "Put Your Hand in the Hand")
Al Daddy taught me every trick of politics before the age of seven
I was raisin' cash at every birthday bash by age eleven
Then I told all my friends that I invented the yo-yo and the spellin' bee
And that prepared me for the days of raisin' money at the DNC
So put ten grand in the hand of the man who built computers
Put ten grand in the hand of the man who made PCs
Fill the check out yourself, and make it out to A-L, G-O-R-E
You'll be puttin' ten grand in the hand of the man from Tennessee
(Naomi enters)
Al (Why, hello. If it isn't my high-priced clothing consultant, Naomi Wolf!)
Naomi Fifteen grand in my hand so you'll be an alpha male, now
Al Fifteen grand in your hand so I'll look good on TV
Naomi When I'm done with you, you'll be more GQ, in colors by Esprit
Al Yes, the clothing makes the man Naomi But take Œem off and Al, you'd still bore me
(Naomi exits, Tipper enters)
Al (Why, hi there, Tipper!)
Tipper When Al was just a kid, every time he got some money, he spent it
Al spent it
Tipper On a big erector set, and that's how the Internet got invented
Al Oh, yeah
(Capitol Steps parody of "Cat's in the Cradle")
(Enter Dad, George Bush Senior)
Dad (Hi. George Bush here. Usually, a former President doesn't take sides when his party picks a candidate. But in the year 2000 election, am I gonna stay neutral? Not gon' do it. Not gonna go there.)
Dad I got a real fine son, who's a candidate
He's the gov'nor they're lovin' in the Lone Star state
(enter son)
He's got the vision thing, and a resume
With a little Kennebunkport DNA
And I get so proud when he says to me
Son I want to be like you, dad
I wanna be just like you
Both Aristocrat since the cradle with a silver spoon
Dad Little George Junior's gonna go for the moon
Son When will I be President?
Dad I don't know when
You're gonna have a good time then, son
Both Gonna have a good time then
Son Dad, can you help me give my polls a push?
Dad Just tell the world you're a son-of-a-Bush
Son Don't get mad, when you see in print
That they got a little dirt on me from Larry Flynt
Dad Another scandal? Hey, join the club
Son I'm not a Bush, I'm just a shrub
Both Democrats gonna ladle out a lotta junk
Dad Did you use cocaine?
Son Only when I was drunk
Dad When will they uncover that?
Son I don't know when
Dad They're gonna have a good time then, son
Both Gonna have a good time then
Dad (No interns)
Son (Not gonna go there)
Both (Wouldn't be prudent)